4/1/98click here to go back to the main
April Fools' Day page
4/1/98
Hall Highlights
Where personal vendettas and cutting-edge journalism meet
"Ubi, ubi, es meo sub ubi?"
| Pawn in the Game of Life | Matt "Chat" Belinkie |
| Keyser Soze | Kevin Spacey |
| Gettin' Jiggy | Wit' It |
| Let me hear you say "Day-o" | Day-o |
| Whatever it is I think I see | becomes a Tootsie Roll to me |
| Detective Sipowicz | I don't play games! |
| Like | Whatever |
| Play 4 | 4 6 7 9 |
| Heavens | to Betsy |
| Shillelagh | n. a cudgel of wood |
| Shalala | n. current secretary of Health & Human Services |
| Official soft drink | KAS |
| The money's buried | Ahhhh! [dies] |
| In the end there is nothing | Only death |
Highlights is published from 2 to 10 times a year, depending on how well we do down at the track. The newspaper's purpose is to get us into college, provide a forum for photos of the wonderful Mark Grudzien, and give us an opportunity for white collar crime.
Unsigned editorials represent the views of the web site we steal them from. All other editorials have been replaced with Folgers crystals; so far no one's noticed. One more thing: maybe in an ideal world we would edit only for length, but in reality, we edit because most of the stuff that is submitted to us is scrawled in some sort of shorthand Cro-Magnon dialect, and contains random references to Brad Pitt.
Those responsible...
Titanic: MB (photo JM)
Bomb: JM (photo BJ)
Hoyt vs. Burtness: MB/CY (photo BJ)
Twister™: MB (photo BJ)
Teenage Poet: JM
Devine: PK
Girl Power: CY (photo JM)
Trotsky: AN
Language Lab: MB
Sidelites: CY/MB
Project 21: JS
Jerry: MB/CY (photo JM)
Monster Truck: MB (photo JM)
MmmBop: JM (caption MB)
Credits: MB/JM/CY